These Hands: A Campaign Log

Kidnapped and knocked out by goons, the party wakes in a cave and treks through the dungeon together, sizing each other up as a ragtag crew all heading toward the city.

• We start in a cave after being kidnapped
• Knocked unconscious by goons, courtesy of these hands
• Traveled through the dungeon
  • Saw PBJ the long way
  • Neck-checked a goon
  • Character finds the wizard a bit much
  • Will protect the short cleric with his life
  • Curious about the cleric being able to open a chest with hands
  • Golden lizard lady seems too serious, but she doesn't seem bad
  • Merfolk saved by these hands
  • Overall a ragtag group of individuals who all seem to be heading to the city

The party navigates a gnome civil war between red and blue colonies, declines to get involved, beats "Gnome Tyson," picks up new member Moss, and sneaks into Heaven's Reach.

• Discover a gnome colony (red and blue)
  • Red gnomes are partners; blue gnomes are militaristic
  • Both sides hate each other for no reason
  • Shrubbery bush competition where red wins every year
  • If we'd helped one side, they would have rewarded us with something
  • Decided not to help the gnomes
  • Fought Gnome Tyson
    • Nearly lost, but won
• Met new character Moss, who eats moss and is looking for "new experiences"
• Made it to Heaven's Reach entrance
  • Guards weren't letting anyone in, so we decided to sneak in
    • Due to a high stealth check, I was able to sneak in

With Lord Baskerville missing and his heirs feuding, the broke party joins the adventurers' guild, takes a pest-control job, and barely survives an old man's ambush and an eldritch panther.

• Lord Baskerville missing
  • War brewing between his 3 children
    • Eldest daughter and son are favorable; youngest son is an idiot
  • No one is being told the riddle without reason
    • Have to be of high standing
• Broke
• Joined the adventurers' guild on a temp ID
• Took on a quest to get rid of a pest
• Met an old man
• Old man tried to kill us
• Killed an eldritch panther thing
• Almost died

Sent to investigate a water-logged town, the party uncovers Dr. Tombs' book, fights zombies, and exposes their host Wendell as the villain behind it all — with a Wendigo fight looming.

• Returned from the quest
• Got 5 gold
• New quest: check out a water-logged town, as no one has been reporting in
• Went to the town
• Villagers are creepy and acting weird
• Met Wendell
• Wendell is a bit suspicious
• Went through the manor
• Discovered claws and other randomness
• Found the book by Dr. Tombs
• Attacked by zombies
• Easily killable
• Solved riddles
• Secret door in the study
• Wendell is the bad guy
• Fighting the Wendigo next session

The party kills the Wendigo (testicular torsion, no less), watches Wendell die to cyanide, gets conned out of their reward, and strikes a wary deal with Princess Lysandra Baskerville for access to the first gem.

• Fought the Wendigo
• Killed the Wendigo with testicular torsion
• Dr. Wendell died to cyanide
• Returned back
• Got conned out of our money — no one believed the story of the Wendigo
• Met Princess Lysandra Baskerville
• Whole team is skeptical of the deal
  • May need to check the mage tower for info on Dr. Tombs
• Working with the princess to get access to the next gem
• Next gem is located back at the statue where we got the nature-check boost
• Plan: go to the statue to access the first gem dungeon

The party braves the statue's trial — mirrors, a broken bridge, and a living statue — and wins the first gauntlet gem, leveling up as a beam signals the next clue.

• Left the princess
• Grabbed Asakura from his apartment
• Went on a path to the blacksmith
• Found umbral iron
• Dead smithy found with it
• Made it to the actual smithy
  • He is making umbral fists for my character (came down to a vote)
• Ran into Team Aqua
  • Thought about jumping them, but did not, due to sheer numbers
• Made it back to the statue
• Did a bow
• Entered the trial
• Room of mirrors
  • Asakura got snuck by himself
  • Everyone else dodged
• Room with a broken bridge
  • Moss bridged it from the bottom
• Room with a statue
  • Bow or kneel
  • Everyone bowed except Bingus
  • Statue started moving and began combat
  • A lot of whiffs
  • Moonbeam FTW
  • Nathan landed the final blow — got the first gem for the gauntlet
  • Ended with a beam sent outward, marking where a clue was
  • Must now escape
  • Levelled up

Asakura gets the Umbral Gauntlets and a curse from Dr. Tombs; the party survives a cult-flooded city, cautiously loops in the princess, and learns from the wizard librarian that Dr. Tombs is hunting a dead god.

• Escaped the dungeon; everyone now hunting for where the light beamed outward
• Went back to the blacksmith
  • Asakura got cursed, courtesy of Dr. Tombs
  • Said he'd be done with the weapon in a few days — then said it already was
  • Obtained the Umbral Gauntlets
• Headed back to the city; ran into Moss, now working as a guardian at the gate entrance
• City was attacked by the Team Aqua Cult and the lower floors were flooded
• Gained entry to the city, ran back to the princess
• Not sure if we should tell the princess about the found amulet
  • Told her in the end, but the group still doesn't fully trust her
  • Took a nap to regain strength
  • Asakura and Alera snooped in her office
    • Discovered that Moss comes from a long line of legendary adventurers
  • Went to the wizard's tower to discover how to break Asakura's curse
  • Thanks to Moss' charisma, got info on the curse plus an audience with the wizard librarian, who may know more about Dr. Tombs' book
    • Dr. Tombs was a powerful necromancer who once attended the academy here
    • Went rogue, plotting to revive and control a dead god
    • No clue on his current whereabouts
    • Librarian turns out to be the old man who lived in the middle of nowhere a few sessions back
    • Ends with Asakura strangled by a death knight

The party disguises as goblins to infiltrate a gem-based bank, rescues a witch named Agatha, robs some corrupt guards, and stumbles onto a shipment guarded by catfish people.

• Turns out the death knight is an aarakocra belonging to the guy in the cloak
• The guy wants to know how we found the next clue
• Realized it was the princess' brother, who runs the Guild
• We warn the princess
  • Turns out she already knew
  • Mentions the Thieves' Guild might know the next clue's whereabouts
  • But we had to make a detour for supplies first
• Headed to a meteor crash site for supplies from goblins, halflings, and trolls
  • Saw a witch about to be burned at the stake
  • Rescued her — her name was Agatha, and she vanished
  • May come back in a good/bad way
• Only short characters could get in
• Used an illusion spell to turn everyone into goblins and snuck in
• Moss and Bingus interact with the queen
• Nathan, Alera, and Asakura eye a bank heist
• Found out the bank only uses rocks — then that the "rocks" are actually gemstones
• Asakura dips to one of the four caves
• Nathan and Alera stay together, originally planning to raid a cave, but discover the guards skim money from the workers
  • Plan shifts to ambushing the guards for their loot
  • Night falls
  • Asakura procures some boots
  • Bingus and Moss get diamonds
  • Nathan and Alera sneak up on a guard named Gregory, who goes splat on the back bank wall
• Head back to the entrance where we saw the packages
• Went in to get Moss and Bingus, plus the supplies
• Walked in to find the boxes held captive by catfish people?

After beating the catfish captors and reconnecting with the returning Surina, the party heads for the Thieves' Guild and meets a mysterious old man with a pipe.

• Fought the catfish people
  • Nathan and Moss fought over copper
  • Alera defeated the boss and we got the package
• Went back to the kingdom
• Started discussing how to get to the next riddle, which involves the tree
• Remembered the Thieves' Guild might know something about the missing tree
• Surina returned from her trip
• Ventured through town, prepped for the upcoming trip
• Heart-to-heart with Bingus
  • Told him Nathan wanted nothing to do with the wish, just revenge
• Started venturing out to the Thieves' Guild
• Ran into goblins
• Moss absorbed a man
• Beat the goblins and had an encounter with an old man with a pipe — that's where we ended

The pipe man grants each character a boon tied to a personal question, revealing (via Moss's dream) a piece of Nathan's traumatic backstory, before the party treks through a sewer to a hidden village.

• Re-interact with the old pipe man, who asks about our greatest desires
  • Asakura got his turtle (asked about his turtle)
  • Alera got a compass (asked where the heart of the forest is)
  • Nathan got a fushigi-ball orb thing that let him view his father — before Dr. Tombs waved the vision's magic away
  • Moss got a bottle with a key inside (asked about Nathan's backstory)
• Asakura and Bingus got high
• Moss dreamt about Nathan's backstory
  • All Moss knows: Nathan, as a kid, had a happy family life until he saw his mother murdered by a figure resembling his father
• Treaded further to an abandoned coastal town
• Ran into some rogue rat-people
• Caught them and asked about the location of the Thieves' Guild
• Found a well
• Moss dove in naked
• Everyone followed suit except Asakura
• Walked through a sewer
• Found a village
• Ran into a bear person who needed help
  • Turns out he got stood up for a date

While chasing a gauntlet upgrade, Nathan uncovers the White Mask Cult; the party infiltrates their bar in disguise, gets handed cult "missions," and is ambushed by frog assassins.

• Moss subbed in for the bear person's date
• Surina and team visit an auction and get a fish
• Nathan, unamused, heads to the blacksmith
  • Secretly visits a tailor for a butler suit and mask
  • Finds out about the white mask cult
  • Gets an oversized suit; told to watch for the "mask man"
  • Talks to the smithy about upgrading the gauntlets
    • Told it would cost 15 plat
    • Nathan asks to trade a task instead
    • Told to find a warehouse key from the cult
  • Accidentally breaks his fingers after learning items can't be picked up by anyone but their owner
    • Had to go get Bingus
    • Fingers healed
  • Returns with the gauntlet-upgrade info; team agrees
  • Goes through the sewer system
    • Nathan bitten by a piranha
  • Sees a white cult member just standing in the path — turns out it's Asakura, in a white mask cult outfit
  • The mask has some addictive magic that won't let your body take it off
  • Group heads to a white mask cult bar
    • Bar is run by frog people in the back; a being with purple gem eyes writes messages
    • Went in disguise via Asakura's disguise magic
    • Alera and Nathan notice no one inside is speaking — everyone just gets a message and leaves
    • Relayed telepathically via Asakura
    • Everyone sat and awaited their message
      • Bingus: take care of a member in the back — given a gun
      • Asakura: told to walk out
      • Alera: task was to kill Asakura
      • Nathan: task was to kill Asakura's turtle
      • Surina: task was to help Bingus in the back
    • Everyone splits up
      • Asakura, Nathan, Alera: the two follow Asakura to the end of a sewer path, trying to figure out how to handle the situation; Asakura realizes what's happening and panics
      • Bingus & Surina: Surina finds Bingus in the back, caressing the cult member he was supposed to kill; he heals the member's curse instead, and Surina asks about the warehouse key — turns out the frog people and the big boss have it; they run out immediately after
    • Bingus and Surina catch up with Nathan and the others, but the team doesn't notice 3 frog assassins closing in

The frog assassins haul the party before the Toad King, where a fake Asakura (a doppelganger) nearly gets away with it before escaping, and Nathan secures the warehouse key with Pepe's help.

• Interrupted by 3 frog assassins: Richard, Pepe, and one other frog
• The frogs are only after Asakura, for leading the group to the cult hideout
• Team tries talking (and magic tricks, courtesy of Nathan) to get to the leader for the keys
• Between the antics and Moss falling from the sky onto one of the frogs, they decide to haul everyone to the Toad King instead
• En route, Moss informs everyone we are now sponsored by Mug Root Beer
• At the entrance, the Toad King just wants to kill Asakura
• Asakura offered a trade: his turtle for his life, plus 600 gold
• Accepts — then is revealed to have been a doppelganger the whole time
• Group fights the doppelganger; after many attempts, it escapes
• Nathan still needs the warehouse key, so he talks Pepe into helping in exchange for adventure
• Pepe agrees, helps Nathan get the key from his father, the Toad King
• Pepe sticks around afterward, tagging along with Nathan and the gang — Nathan's way of making good on the adventure he owes him
• Nathan succeeds and grabs the key, but notices a captive being held hostage
  • Offers help, but she needed a remote to be freed
  • Can't risk another encounter, so he leaves her — but will likely tell the group
• Meanwhile the group loots magical artifacts, including a skeleton key
• Richard dies to the doppelganger
• Nathan comes out to find the team doing miscellaneous things

Back in the city, Nathan joins the Thieves' Guild to recover his stolen gauntlets, dons cursed strength-for-intelligence gloves, and cracks open a vault — right as the guild starts rumbling.

• Group decides to return to the city
• Nathan goes to recover the keys
  • Finds out the Thieves' Guild stole his gauntlets
  • Threatens the guy — fails
  • Given a map of the sewers and instructions to the guild, plus some cursed gauntlets
• Walks into the tunnels toward the Thieves' Guild after a long rest
• Encounters a slime monster asking for the password
• Gives the password, proceeds to the guild
• Asakura gets drunk off water
• Bingus is acting different (keep an eye on him)
• Learns Richard was a member of the guild
• Nathan tries to peruse the guild, stopped by a Cheshire cat figure
• Learns the guild does have his gauntlets — asks what it'd take to get them back
  • The cat offers guild membership plus one completed mission
  • Nathan and Alera both join, for the benefits and the intel the guild might get Nathan
• Nathan and Alera enter a back room full of treasure
• All doors have locks
• Alera finds a hammer with Fix-It-Felix powers
  • Accidentally fixes the lock on a tough door
• Nathan puts on the cursed gloves
  • Immense strength, at the cost of his intelligence
• Destroys the door, finds a chest and a Labubu
• After opening the one door, the guild starts rumbling — where we ended

The party helps a Leonin overthrow a hair-stealing tyrant by infiltrating and winning a monster truck derby, taking down the armored Governor Mr. 305.

• Sometime between the last session and a future endeavor, given a quest by Princess Lysandra to help a Leonin whose kingdom is ruled by a tyrant
• Met at a fae cafe
• The Leonin explains: the king who governs the sky kingdom is making everyone go bald, and he needs help overthrowing him
  • The only way in is to enter a monster truck derby competition
• Everyone agrees, gets instantly teleported to the kingdom
• 2 guards on duty, one peeing and one guarding
  • Moss compliments the peeing guard
• Given access to the kingdom; everyone is bald
  • The glare off the balding citizens forces a sunglasses purchase
• Head to the coliseum — too late to formally join the derby
• Alera and Asakura spot a free opening by the trucks; Nathan sneaks in to grab pit-crew clothes
• Nathan sneaks into the employee room (with Pepe's help), finds 5 trucks and racers debating whether to even join
• Nathan convinces them to quit, undetected, and takes their crew jackets
• The crew lead notices everyone's gone and asks who Nathan is
  • Told everyone quit and didn't want to participate
  • Lead says he still needs drivers — Nathan says he knows some people (the party)
• Everyone climbs into the race trucks to prep for battle
• First truck taken down by Nathan, who jumps through the window and knocks the driver clean out
• Then comes the Governor, Mr. 305 — heavily armored, impenetrable car
• The Leonin, now known as McScoogy, hits one of his tires, damaging it
• Team focuses fire on the tires as the weak point
• Mr. 305 takes down Nathan's and Pepe's cars
• Asakura destroys a tire; Alera destroys another
• Moss builds a kamikaze airplane and divebombs with Bingus into the back of the car, denting it
• Nathan jumps onto the back and punches the dent until a big hole opens
• McScoogy lands the final blow through the hole, stopping the car
• Moss turns his spirit weapon into a ball and beans the windshield, knocking out Mr. 305
• Party secures the baldness-causing amulet; McScoogy returns hair to all the people
• McScoogy keeps Mr. 305 as his personal form of entertainment

A wood dragon hunting the forest's heart drags the party into a zombie-tree brawl alongside new arrival Gorax, ending with Surina hurling the heart into the dragon and the group being swept into the second dungeon.

• Preface: I wasn't available, so my character Nathan was trapped inside a Labubu
• Main synopsis: the rumbling turned out to be a wood dragon searching for the heart of the forest, which was in the Thieves' Guild. The team opened doors and fought off wood zombie creatures sent to distract the dragon.
• They also meet Gorax the Destroyer, who has a deep hatred for trees and demolishes a ton of tree zombies
• The heart was found; Moss got hurt by the spikes guarding it
• Surina grabbed the heart and tried to return it to the dragon
• Asakura (now known as Marty Supreme) found Pokemon cards and fell to his doom
• Surina threw the heart at the dragon, opening a portal into it — everyone went in and was transported into the second dungeon

Freed from the Labubu but down two teammates, Nathan fights through spider-infested caves, joins a druid war party undercover, and learns the druids and elves are locked in a 50-year game for the forest's fate.

• Entering the dungeon, Nathan was freed, but Moss and Alera were sent into the Labubu
• Three paths available
  • A tree village (avoided — Gorax might destroy it)
  • An egg-shaped dome, where a tree golem and a rock golem were duking it out
  • A river where a wyvern was dwelling
• Went for the dome path
• Encountered a cave full of webs, then a giant spider
• Nathan killed the first spider
• 2 more spiders appeared — Gorax and the gang took them out (Nathan bitten on the head, Bingus trapped in the web)
• Left the caves, ran into a scout crew of druid barbarians
• Wary of us, they dressed Nathan up as a barbarian to scout the area
• The barbarians accepted Nathan into the crew, said the area was on lockdown, and brought him into the dwelling
• Inside: a giant fitness dwelling where the barbarians were prepping for something
• After talking with a bunch of barbarians and a bit of rest, Nathan learns the barbarians and elves are competing in a 50-year-long game to determine the fate of the forest
• Nathan meets the chief, who explains the games and gets the group entry into the cave
• Nathan also learns that if the druids win, they'll burn the forest to the ground
• Nathan secures the group's entry and recalls what he was told
• As the group starts to relax, horns sound, the chief emerges in white bear form, and declares the games begin

As Nathan plays "jungler" in the druid-vs-elf tournament, the rest of the party causes chaos chasing the second gem — and Nathan uncovers a gnome plot to make both sides destroy each other.

• The chief sets the lineup for the game (he can't play, having played last round — it's run like a League of Legends tourney)
• Lineup: Nathan, the chief's brother, 2 more druids, and a gnome who benched the chief last round
• Nathan is, essentially, the jungler
• While he preps, the team handles other business
  • Surina got sent into the Labubu
  • Moss and Gorax went to the gnome offices
  • Asakura went to rest
  • Alera and the half-god (who can now partially separate from her, Jojo's-stand style) went to ask more about the games
• Alera learns from the elves (the opposing team) that if they win, they'll hunt all non-plant creatures
• Nathan gets to use his shadow gloves — he can command a shadow clone that mimics him 5 seconds later
• Meanwhile
  • Moss and Gorax enter the gnome-run Reception office to retrieve the trophy, believed to hold the second jewel
    • Moss gets explosive diarrhea from a hotdog
    • Literally shits on the receptionist, traumatizing her
    • Gorax grabs the trophy but falls with it, dazing himself
    • Moss just watches
  • Alera tries to get intel, gets annoyed at the food booth; the demigod blows up the food stalls, causing a commotion
    • They end up at the reception office and see the aftermath of Moss
    • They reach the Gnome King's quarters, attack, and get defeated by the gnome guard mages
    • Moss still watches from afar
  • Marty Supreme wakes up to gnomes ransacking the druid camp and fouling their protein powder
    • Once they notice he's awake, the gnomes bag him and try to drown him at the river for seeing too much
    • Moss tries to message-trick the gnomes — fails
    • Tries again on the dumbest gnome — succeeds, and escapes
    • The other gnomes toss the dumb gnome down the waterfall instead
    • Marty casts feather fall to soften the gnome's landing
    • Marty, content, watches the gnome resurface (more on that next time)
  • Nathan fights a ton of beasts, racking up points for the druids
  • Nathan asks an elf why the elves and druids are trying to destroy each other, and whether peace was ever on the table
    • Nathan suspects the gnomes are behind it, since they act as intermediaries to both tribes
  • Nathan catches the dumb gnome and interrogates him, learning the gnomes' whole plan
    • Get the elves and druids to wipe each other out, then take the land for themselves
  • Nathan kicks the gnome back up the waterfall — the gnome warns Marty of a great evil he encountered, not realizing the "evil" was Nathan himself, having just used fear tactics on him to get the information

A reset flings the party back to the Session 15 cliffside with their memories intact, and they use that knowledge to expose the gnomes to both the elves and the druids — who'd been framing each other the whole time — picking up the Elven chief as an ally along the way.

• Nathan is joined by Surina and Marty Supreme in the games, alongside the gnome punted back up the waterfall earlier — now known as Jimothy ("him-o-the")
  • Notice a fire approaching while discussing how to leave the games; decide to destroy the crystal and head for the gnome castle instead
• Gorax, unstunned, ends up face-to-face with the gnome king, Gnomethaniel, who demands to know who he is and tries to call the guards
• Gorax uses the Gnome King as a cushion and jumps 20 feet off the balcony with him — the fall kills Gnomethaniel
• The instant he dies, the world freezes — everyone is stuck in place
• The entire party is pulled back to the Session 15 starting point (the cliffside), memories of everything in between fully intact
• Gnomethaniel is believed to be alive again after the reset — the death itself seems to have been undone along with everything else
• Amid the reset, Surina is freed from the Labubu — but Moss ends up trapped inside it instead
• Decide to head straight for the gnome castle to sort out the shenanigans and grab the second gem while they're at it
• This time they go through the Elven village instead of the forest, to avoid an elf ambush
  • Get ambushed by elves anyway; tell them they're the "prophesied heroes" meant to balance the three nations
  • The Elven chief doesn't buy it — until they explain the gnomes may be behind the elf/druid conflict
• Meet the elder elves, who claim they won the last games 50 years ago — directly contradicting what the druids said back in Session 15
  • Elves believe the druids are the ones causing problems for them
  • After Nathan lays out the gnomes' fingerprints — building the games, never handing over the trophy, gnomes embedded on both sides — the elves realize they've been played
• The Elven chief joins the party and heads to the druid camp
• Along the way, a rock golem gets thoroughly demolished by the whole team
• At the druid camp, the druids are about to retaliate against the elves for poisoning their protein powder
  • Marty tells them it was actually the gnomes, peeing and pooping in their supply
  • Druids don't believe it until Alera finds actual gnomes hiding in the protein powder container
  • Druids realize they were sabotaged by the gnomes too

The party storms the gnome castle to stop the frame-up without killing the Gnome King — tightroping past a sea monster, defusing a minefield, and melting a frozen doorway — only to fall through a trap floor into a Hello Kitty-shaped mech piloted by Gnomethaniel himself, gem in hand.

• Everyone's now on the same page: the gnomes sabotaged and framed both the druids and elves
• Hatch a plan to storm the gnome castle and take down the gnomes — but not kill the Gnome King, in hopes of not restarting the world again
• While planning, may have already tipped the gnomes off — not entirely sure
• The plan:
  • The elves and druids send in their weakest challengers to keep the gnomes thinking the games are still going
  • Alera and the demigod blow up a food stand again, to pull the guards out of the castle
  • On the signal, the elves and druids rush the castle to fight the gnomes
  • Someone grabs the jewel from the trophy Gorax and Moss found back in Session 16
• The actual result:
  • Weakest challengers sent in as planned — distraction holds
  • Alera and the demigod set the food stands on fire, and grab gold on the side with Surina and Nathan's help
  • Marty Supreme takes the gnomes' spellbooks to add to his own tome for studying
  • The party meets the gnomes and finds a moat with a robotic sea monster in it
  • A druid tries building a human bridge — fails
  • Surina turns into a bird to scout the far side
  • Nathan talks Big Bertha (a buff elf archer with a great bow) into firing a rope-tied arrow across, then tightropes over
    • Barely escapes the sea monster mid-crossing
  • Alera follows and helps Surina break the gate holding the bridge shut
  • The area beyond is covered in landmines
    • Get the elves to fire arrows across the field to detonate them
  • Spot two gnomes prepping spells to hit the back line (Marty and Gorax)
    • Nathan throws a rock at one; Marty fires a firebolt at the other
    • The rock-stunned gnome still finishes casting and hits Marty, incapacitating him
  • Reach the front door, where another gnome freezes it shut with water and ice spells
    • Gorax melts the ice and they push through
  • In the main lobby, the floor starts pulling apart — a trap
    • Nathan jumps to a chandelier, finds a lever, and breaks it
    • Gorax jumps up to help — breaks the lever even further
    • Everyone just decides to jump down the pit
  • Ends with the party face-to-face with a Hello Kitty-shaped robot holding the gem, piloted by the Gnome King

The party shatters the mech's four shield canisters and Gnomethaniel's crown, killing the Gnome King with his own petrification fluid and claiming the second gem — only for the trial's completion message to glitch out on the next riddle, right before everyone is swept out of the dragon and onto the Great Tree, Surina's home, where it turns out the druids and elves have been trapped for centuries.

• Picks up right where they fell into the pit and found the Hello Kitty robot, with Gnomethaniel and the gem inside
• The battle room has 4 canisters of green liquid wired into the robot, one in each corner, each guarded by a gnome, plus 2 computers off to the side
• The party spends too long strategizing out loud, and the Gnome King capitalizes with a laser that kills Surina outright
• Alera and her spirit shoot one of the canisters, petrifying its guarding gnome
  • Turns out this is exactly how the Gnome King revives — he's furious
• Nathan goes after the next gnome and misses; Gorax finishes it in one slice
• Marty Supreme reaches a computer and disables the robot's electric shields
  • Gets knocked unconscious for his trouble by a dick joke of an attack
• Surina gets revived and moonbeams the Gnome King
  • He shrugs it off and slashes back, knocking Surina out again
• Bingus, holding the gem from the first trial, uses it to teleport Marty over for healing
• Alera destroys two more canisters
• Nathan climbs onto the robot and starts bashing in the crown
• Gorax tries to heal Surina
• The robot tackles backward into a wall, hurting Nathan
• The Elven chief and the Druid chief join the fight and deal major damage to the robot
• Alera breaks the last canister
• Nathan — right after the table realizes he's adding +7 to every attack — finally breaks through the crown, drenching the Gnome King in his own petrification fluid and killing him; the party grabs the second gem
• The petrification goo gets on Nathan's arm too
  • Bingus heals it off
• The robot starts self-destructing
  • Marty and the spirit grab some gold on the way out despite the clock running out
  • Bingus teleports them both onto the Elven chief's cloud, and everyone clears the room
• Back outside, a light from the sky congratulates the party on completing the trial — then glitches out right as it tries to show the riddle for the next clue
• Everyone — party, druids, and elves alike — gets teleported out of the dragon and onto the Great Tree: Surina's home
• Turns out the druids and elves were brought into the dungeon and have been stuck there for centuries — long before the current 50-year game cycle even started

The elders of the Great Tree grill the party about the trial and bristle that none of their own people completed it, then give no answer on how long everyone's been gone. While the group rests, Alera takes an assassination contract on the eldest druid elder — who turns out to be unsurprised and cuts a deal with her — before her attempt on the apothecary fails and the earth starts shaking.

• Pick up with the elders of the Great Tree, who ask the party about completing the trial — and are slightly upset that it wasn't one of their own people who did it
• The party relays what they know about the dungeon trial
• They ask how long it's been; no information is given
• The party decides to rest
  • Marty Supreme buys an artifact that lets him teleport once
• Alera takes on an assassination quest targeting the eldest druid elder, and is given a poison for it
  • They look into killing the apothecary first, but discover the shop is trapped
  • They go to the elder instead
  • He's losing hope that the chief (Surina's father) will make it back before the tribe goes rogue
  • Alera explains the assassination — and who wants him dead
  • The elder isn't surprised: he's been trying to hold the balance of nature in the village while the chief is away at war
  • Alera bargains: she'll try to kill the apothecary who sold her the poison in the first place, in exchange for diplomatic immunity on the attempt
  • The elder says he may be able to pardon it
  • The attempt fails — and the session ends with the earth shaking